“For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.” (Genesis 18:19).
A man might be on the whole a good man, and yet be marked by some defect which mars his character and prevents his usefulness or makes him the unintentional cause of much grief. Abraham was not such a man (Genesis 18:19) but Eli was (I Samuel 2:12-36).
Campuses of Higher Institutions of learning today in Nigeria and in fact in all over the world are full with one challenge or the other. These challenges are sometimes referred to as misconducts, disobedience to the constituted authority etc. They are in different sizes, shapes and colour. They include but are not limited to examination malpractices, sexual immorality, cultism, gambling, smoking, sagging, indecent dressing, immodest speeches, committing suicide, etc.
The wondrous and disheartening aspect of the trend is the very fact that those caught in these crime emerge from one home with a father who is expected by the Lord to “command his children and his household after him,” so that “they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment.” (Genesis 18:19, cf. Ephesians 6:3). Further injury is caused when the culprit claimed to be follower of Christ – Christian. It shocks and saddens even the more when the ‘criminal’ is from Elder’s (or Deacon’s, Preacher’s or even leading member’s) home.
The question now is what is the way out? To state that these problems never exist is like a man who deliberately closed his eyes pretending that he is asleep when he himself knows fully well that he is awake.
The Preliminaries
Many parents have left their God-given assignments in pursuit of worldly fame, position, recognition and other things (which war against their souls and that of their children) forgetting that they are sojourners and pilgrims here on earth (cf. 1Peter 2:11; ). The failures are sometimes traceable to the inability of the parent to use scriptural judgment in assisting the children in making lifelong decisions. For example, when there was a fight between the herdsmen of Lot and Abram in Genesis 12, Abram used scriptural principle and judgment when he said unto Lot, "Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we be brethren" (vs.8). On the contrary, Lot had forgotten that he was not alone and that he must think and apply God's wisdom and have deep thought about how he would lead his children in the way of the Lord (of which Abram could have been of great assistance to), who should be his in-laws, and the happiness of his daughters thereafter. Like many parents would do today by thinking of money
first, the worldly things first, etc: "And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it was well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, even as the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar. Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other" (vss. 10-11). The rest was story and repercussion of his selfish and ungodly decision. He lost all he had: wife (who looked back and turned pillar of salt), daughters, home, happiness, wealth, son in-laws and all that he had ever worked for (Genesis 19:14-38). So many today are not careful or even careless in choosing where their children would study; all what concerns them is how would they 'make it'; forgetting that there is a way that seemeth right before man, but the end thereof is the way of destruction (Proverb 14:12). Many today have misled their children by choosing for them the best school in academics but the worst in moral and at the end, she became prostitutes and unbeliever even though she left home a Christian!
The Procedures
God had not left us without His words to lead us and guide us (Psalms 119:108; 2 Timothy 3:16). The Holy Bible which is the only book that contains the mind of God had a pattern for the parents on how to provide the necessary spiritual guide, help and assistance to our children in campuses of our higher institutions of learning.
God had given us duties and responsibilities in the home as a way of providing spiritual assistance for our children. Fathers have the duty to perform in bringing their children up in the ways of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). God expected it of Abraham (Genesis 18:19) and commanded Israel to teach their children in the way of the Lord (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). So, it is expected of fathers to provide the kind of leadership Joshua did for his family (Joshua 24:15).
In doing this, God expect from fathers to be patient with their children. Fathers are not to provoke their children to wrath (Ephesians 6:4) and must not be so overbearing as to discourage their children (Colossians 3:21); even though this does not mean that there is never discipline (Hebrews 12:5-11). Fathers are to provide the proper balance between love and discipline.
As parents, God expect us to teach our children from home before they leave for us for higher institutions how to honour their parent, because it is a duty for all children (Ephesians 6:1-2). They are to be informed that Children are to provide for their mothers and grandmothers (1 Timothy 5:4, 16). Failure to teach them all of these will mean preparing them to be unruly and disobedient to constituted authority.
In order to provide necessary assistance for our children in our campuses, there is the need to teach them from home how they should exercise themselves to godliness as Paul charged Timothy (1 Timothy 4:7-8). This involves fleeing some things, while pursuing others (1 Timothy 6:11; 2 Timothy 3:16-17) such as fleeing the love of money and youthful lusts (1 Timothy 6:10; 2 Timothy 2:22; 1 Corinthians 6:18); pursuing righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, gentleness (1 Timothy 6:11; 2 Timothy 2:22). In doing these, having been thoroughly grounded, will assist our children to make every effort to be a true child of God in their campuses even when we are several hundreds of kilometres away.
Additionally, we are to teach them how to utilize their God-given gifts (Romans 12:3-6). As a bachelor/spinster, we are to encourage them to be an example to other Christians. Remember, this was/is the charge given to Timothy, who was single (1 Timothy 4:12), likewise to Titus (Titus 2:7), even as Paul did himself (1 Thessalonians 2:10). We are to teach them to remember their creator in the days of their youth when they can use their freedom for the Lord. Paul wrote that the unmarried can do more for the Lord (1 Corinthians 7:32-34) because they do not have spousal and parental duties.
Many parents are fond of saying "we are praying for them (their wards)" who they have not taught the Words of Life. Matthew Henry, wrote (when he was commenting on Genesis 18:19) that Abraham "not only prayed with his family, but he taught them as a man of knowledge, nay, he commanded them as a man in authority, and was prophet and king, as well as priest, in his own house…" (emphasis, KSA). In order to assist these kids when they get to the campuses of higher learning in this perverse world which had been drunk with all evils and wickedness of the highest order, it is the duty of parents to teach them the way of the Lord and then pray with and for them.
The purpose
The Bible clearly stated that parents should "Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it." Reading through Ecclesiastes 11:9 through 12:1, the wise man stated reasons and purposes for providing necessary spiritual help for our children. Among them are:
- The Youth has no guarantee of the future. Death has no respect for age, he strikes and kill any irrespective of the age. This is so because life itself is a vapour (James 4:14-17). Secondly, the Lord is coming in judgment and all must be prepared to meet Him (2 Peter 3:7, 9-11; 2 Thessalonians 1:7-9). Parents are to supply the necessary aids and assistance to these children in and outside their homes and domains.
- Misspent youth can curse future life. The eternal law of sowing is still there: whatever you sow, you shall reap (Galatians 1:7-9), and there is danger in sowing the wild coats (Hosea 8:7), such as sowing the seeds of rebellion against parents when not rebuked, will germinated to rebellion against the constituted authority which will results in "carrying placards", participating in destructive and violence demonstration, stealing and the rest that goes along with it. Other seeds in this line included but not limited to lying, fornication, drug abuse and alcohol.
When parents inculcate into their children the necessity of remembering their creator all the days of their life, it is an effort in the right direction of providing the required spiritual assistance to them, this is so because the Bible declared that "Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying." (Proverbs 18:19).
The Pattern
The parents are to teach the whole truth to their children while they are with them at home and when they have gone to the higher institution for academic pursuit. There are lots of issues we must discussed at home level and teach very well to our children before they move to higher institutions where the will start to mix with 'all' philosophers of this world who had been given to errors and unsound doctrines whose eye of understanding had been darkened (Ephesians 4:17-19). Few of them are as listed below:
Teach about:
- Creation. Teach your child that Biblical story of creation is a reality and not chance! We are made in the image of God. Hence, all men are as a result of intelligent design and eternal purpose of God (Genesis 1-3; Ephesians 1); we are spiritual not alien (Acts 17:28), God is the Father of our spirits (Hebrews 12:9; Genesis 1:26; Matthew 10:28-29; Ecclesiastes 3:11).
- The Bible as the Word of God. Enforce daily reading of the Bible (Psalms 119:11; 2 Timothy 2:15). Let them see that the Bible contains commandments of God and not suggestions or opinions of men (Hebrews 2:1-3a; 10:28, 29).
- The New Testament Church. Let them see from the Bible that there is just only one church (Ephesians 4:4; Colossians 1:18, 24). Jesus died for the church to purchased it with His precious blood (Acts 20:28) and only those that are saved are members of the church (Acts 2:47), and that there are none who are saved that are not in it (Ephesians 5:23-27). Against what religious teachers and lecturers would teach and say such as "Join the church of your choice", the choice has already been made regarding the church. We are to teach them that our choice is the same as that of Joshua, who said: "Choose you this day whom ye will serve…" (Joshua 24:15). Make it clear that if they choose to serve Christ (which they must), they must choose His church(Ephesians 4:4-6; Matthew 16:16-18; Colossians 1:13, 18, 24).
- There are wicked people in the world. Let them know before they got out there that there are wicked people around in the world and most often among the closest friends. It may be hard to accept but teach them to be aware that in the world some of those who are enjoyable could be wicked, evil or even bad. Parents are responsible to let their children know about the warnings of the Bible concerning making friends with wicked and evil people (1 Corinthians 15:33; Proverbs 25:17; 1:10-19; Judges 16:1-20; 2 Samuel 11:; 13:1-5; Matthew 26:48,49). Teach that truth and righteousness may cause a separation between childhood friends as they become adults (Matthew 10:34-40; Luke 12:51-53). Teach them to beware but be friendly (1 Corinthians 13; cf. John 2:23-25; Matthew 10:16).
- God hates Divorce. Do not say they are young and that they can not comprehend. In this age of Computer, internet and technology it will surprise you that they are exposed to all kinds of dangers which they consider to be enjoyable not knowing that it would be for a season (Hebrews 11:25). If you really want and desire to assist them spiritually, you need to teach them repeatedly that God "hate putting away" (Malachi 2:16). Divorce is not God's desired purpose for man in marriage (Genesis 3:22-24). Make it clear that anytime a divorce occurs somebody had already sinned and probably continuing in sin until repentance (Matthew 5:32; 19:1-11; Luke 16:18; Mark 10:2-12; I Corinthians 7:1-16). Divorce negatively impacts a lot of people such as children, parents, affected couple, new partner that would be remarried, friends to the affected couple, the church and the nation. Teach your children to learn how to be committed when it is ripe for them to make a choice in the Lord concerning whom to marry.
- Baptism is important to salvation. Sound it loud that one can not be saved without water baptism (Matthew 28:18-20; Mark 16:15, 16; 1 Peter 3:21; Galatians 3:26, 27; Ephesians 5:23-26). Explain that baptism puts believers into Christ where remission of sins is (Romans 6:3-4; Acts 2:38; Matthew 26:28; 1 Corinthians 12:13) and that the baptized believer is under obligation to God to live right and conform himself unto the examples of Christ Jesus ( 1 Corinthians 11:1; Romans 6:1-11).
- Sin is black, Hell is hot and Eternity is forever. Let them know from time to time that there is no such thing as little sin or white lies (1 John 1:6-10; Revelations 21:8). Let them see from the pages of the scriptures that God does not fellowship with impenitent sinner (Isaiah 59:1,2; 1 John 1:6) and will punish sin and the issue of hell is not just another fairy tale (Mark 9:44-48; Matthew 25:44-46; Romans 2:5-11; 6:23).
- Integrity, honesty, respect for authority, moral courage and excellence (Romans 12:17; 2 Corinthians 13:7; 1 Peter 2:12). All are to be honest with God, His Word, Jesus Christ and His church (Number 32:23; John 12:48) and be honest with ourselves and be honest to other fellow colleagues (1 Peter 3:10; Proverbs 11:9). Be honest to teachers and Parents (Galatians 4:1-2; Ephesians 6:1; Romans 13:1, 2; Leviticus 19:32; Matthew 8:5-10). Our youth in our campuses are to be brave and ready to resist all influences that come their ways to lead them into sins. They are to be aware and be properly guided in the Bible that they will face challenges which they must confront with moral courage. These include modesty (1Timothy 2:9,10; 1 Peter 3:1-6; Proverbs 2:10); alcohol and drugs (1 Peter 4:1-4; Proverbs 23:29-35); dance (Galatians 5:21); Gangs (Proverbs 1:10-19); Charles Darwin's theory of evolution and humanism (Psalms 14:1; Romans 1:20); sex education and fornication (campus couple, 'aristo') (Matthew 19:1-12; Genesis 2:24-26; 1 Corinthians 7:1-5).
The Plea
Brethren, it is time for all of us to rise to the challenge of assisting our youth to know why we believe what we believe and we need to assist them in putting them through in all the ways that would make them a true disciples of Christ and a worthy ambassadors of Christ in their campuses and not to be a ready species and victim in the hands of wolves in our campuses.
This we must do because we are under obligation to God to do so and remain faithful just like Abraham did!
P. O. Box 35478, Agodi-Gate, Ibadan, Oyo State, Nigeria. +234-80-56048209.
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